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5 Current Goals

Blogging Challenge Day 8: 5 current goals

Hmmm, now that’s a tough one, not necessarily because I do not have goals, but rather, because I prefer to keep certain things to myself. Nonetheless, since I committed to this blogging challenge, here goes.
1. To have my first child
2. To get my PhD.
3. To set up a trust that funds education for disadvantaged girls.
4. Move up in my career
5. Embark in more meaningful financial investments.
That’s it in a nutshell.

15 Essential Handbag Items

Blogging Challenge: Day 9 – What’s in your handbag

Ooooh, this challenge is becoming increasingly personal, pushing me to share more and more intimate details about my life.

For most people sharing such details is probably normal, but for very private individuals who are introverts like me it’s a lot to ask.

Anyway, here goes – and note, these are essential.

A book to read.

A Prison Diary.jpgIn my case it’s “A prison diary” volume III by Jeffrey Archer
This is the latest book I’m reading and I’ve just started it. So far, it’s interesting, but then again, I love Jeffrey Archer and enjoy everything he writes. This helps to fend off boredom in case I find myself with extra time on my hands, e.g in a service queue that is not moving.

Personal Organizer

Purchased in March 2013, my Samsung Galaxy Note 10.1 tablet has become my reliable companion and personal assistant. I take it wherever I go and use it to organize my life. It has outlived most of my other gadgets and is extremely handy.

Mobile Phone

Mine is a Samsung A8. I’m sure it’s clear by now that I’m an android loyalist. This is my back up companion and most essential for communication.

Kleenex facial tissue pack

Absolutely necessary for all sorts of emergencies, the chief one being a sudden runny nose caused by an allergy or the urge to cry – although the latter hasn’t happened to me yet.

Powerbank

Another necessity in case the gadget battery dies while one is on the move, particularly given the unpredictability of life.

Earrings

Always handy, in case of a change of plan – particularly on the social scene.

Used up boarding passes

Just returned to Harare from spending time with family in Bulawayo (the City of Kings) today and am yet to clean out my handbag. This is not essential but happens to be in my bag. However, they may be a useful alibi.

Black pocket diary

This is actually not mine. It’s my Mom’s. We had one of our quality time days and went shopping together. I was responsible for writing the to do and shopping lists and ticking our achievements. After running our errands, I packed the notebook in my handbag and forgot to return it to my mom. Nonetheless, it’s a must have. Sometimes technology fails and one must have a little booklet close at hand to note down important things.

Receipt for household items I bought today

This is self explanatory. Also not essential but happens to be in my bag. May be useful as proof of purchase in case of a complaint so may be good to keep them for some days.

Perfume, cosmetic and make up pouch

Yes, I’m a woman and love to smell good. So, in my pouch I have some fragrant scents locked up in tiny bottles. Armani mania – just a few drops left in the bottle, Armani code – virtually empty, Bvugari Jasmine Noir – now empty but still in my bag, Givenchy – Very Irresistible and Victoria’s Secret Escape mist. I also have vitamin E oil,  hand lotion and some make up items.

Septonia anti-bacterial wet wipes pack

Bacteria are lurking everywhere and its best to be safe and disinfect your hands frequently, especially before you eat! Sometimes we find ourselves far from clean water but need to snack or use clean hands. These wet wipes are very hand and easy to carry. I throw them everywhere, including my car, office, laptop and camera bags.

Purse

I guess the contents are the same for most people. Bank cards, identity documents, driver’s license and cash that I will only part with when I can’t swipe.

Keys

Of course, car and house keys.

Pen

Mostly for signing documents and in case technology fails and I have to write something in my little notebook.

Flash disk

In case there’s no internet connection and I need to save some information.

Glass case with two sets of daily disposable contact lenses

Self explanatory.

Emergency kit

Some accidents can be avoided by carrying an emergency case like this one. This hasn’t just saved me, but also comes in handy when fellow women find themselves in distress. The kit contains tampons and pads in all shapes and sizes in order to meet a broad range of needs – ie, mine and those of the next woman who may find herself in a situation. I was a girl guide and our motto was: “Be prepared.” Prior to that, I was a Brownie and our motto was: “Lend a hand.” I guess those two mottos are deeply ingrained in my conduct.

So, in just over 700 words, I have publicized what I would normally consider to be private by sharing what’s in my handbag.

Of strange dreams, analysis & interpretation

I had a very strange dream last night. I dreamt that I was among 11 people from different countries and we were sitting in a waiting area similar to one at an airport. I don’t know what we were wai…

Source: Of strange dreams, analysis & interpretation

Of strange dreams, analysis & interpretation

I had a very strange dream last night. I dreamt that I was among 11 people from different countries and we were sitting in a waiting area similar to one at an airport.

I don’t know what we were waiting for or where we were going, but there we were.

The interesting part of the dream was that if you did something horrible to another person, a calamity similar to the natural disasters that your country is prone to would immediately befall you.

So, if your country is prone to avalanches, you’d immediately be snowed in, right there, in that room! If your country is prone to veld fires, your hair would be singed instantly and if you’re from a flood prone place you’d be soaked in water in a moment!

Only a few people in the dream misbehaved and instantly experienced the consequences of their mischief. I was not among them, just a silent observer in all this.

Not sure why on earth I’d have such a strange dream, but wonder if somewhere in my subconscious mind I felt let down by someone.

I’m not sure what Sigmund Freud would make of this dream, but here’s what I think…

First, in this world that is a global village, we meet all sorts of people from diverse backgrounds. Considering that only a few people misbehaved, my conclusion is that the majority of people on this planet are kind and well meaning.

However, there will always be a few nasty people. I will not use the cliché of a rotten apple in the midst of many good ones, but that’s a fact of life.
Pareto had it right with the 80/20 rule. In this case though, it’s the 80 per cent that are good and 20 per cent that are mean.

Secondly, there are consequences to our behavior, whether good or bad.

Lastly, our transportation to our destination eventually arrived and it was time to go.

The conclusion?

We meet all kinds of people, some good and others bad, some will mess you up but most are too busy getting on with their lives and at some point we all move on and life goes on.

So, just be kind to people, you have nothing to lose a world of possibilities to gain!

Music, the food of the soul

#BloggingChallenge Day 7: My favourite songs

First, before I list my favourite songs, allow me to share a poem I wrote about music some years ago. It sums up my sentiments about music, which I think of as the food of the soul.

Le Musique!

The musician
Tugs the strings of my heart
As he strums the guitar
And caresses my ears
With the saxophone
While stirring my being
With the drum
And soothing my soul
With his voice.

Such joyous sounds
Creating beautiful medleys
That awaken
Countless memories
Tinged with regrets
Endless hopes
For better things to come
Diverse sentiments
About people, places and things
What more can a woman ask?

By Matilda Moyo
04 November, 2010

If music is the food of the soul, then this is what’s on the menu today.

A natural thing by Earl Klugh

Alone in a strange place by Sipho Gumede

Something inside so strong by Labi Siffre

Weeping by Bright Blue

The greatest love of all by Whitney Houston

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The Irrationality of Fear!

The most liberating acronym I’ve come across is the one that defines fear as: F = false E = evidence A = appearing R = real Since I came across this acronym more than 15 years ago, I have learnt to…

Source: The Irrationality of Fear!

3 simple principles for better relationships

We live in a global world, which has become one big village. Movement across the globe has become easy and people are no longer confined to their countries of birth. It is very possible to find a w…

Source: 3 simple principles for better relationships

3 simple principles for better relationships

We live in a global world, which has become one big village. Movement across the globe has become easy and people are no longer confined to their countries of birth. It is very possible to find a whole class of people from different countries studying at the same institution or working in one office.

global-villageOur diverse cultural backgrounds and personalities, should, ideally enrich our experience. However, our perception and conduct can sometimes come across as either pleasant or offensive and can make or break relationships.

It is important that we never assume that the next person understands who we are and where we are coming from. When relating with people from a different set up, it is best to tread carefully and be sensitive, at least until one has developed a level of familiarity that reduces the chances of being offensive.

Here are three principles that can contribute modestly towards helping us to build good relations and enjoy our diversity as we chart our way in the global village.

  1. Never tease people about what’s beyond their control

This is all encompassing and can range from race, tribe, culture, height and nationality to looks. People generally invest in themselves and tend to change what they don’t like. Chances are, if they haven’t changed something about themselves, it’s probably beyond their control.

For example, if a person is short sighted and wears thick glasses and you constantly tease them about that, then it reflects both insensitivity and immaturity on your part. Nobody suddenly wakes up and decides: “Hhhhmmm, I think I want to start wearing spectacles that are half an inch thick from today onwards because I think it’s trendy!” Perhaps that person cannot afford laser treatment or contact lenses and is simply grateful to be able to see through those glasses regardless of the thickness of the lenses.

We all have traits that we are uncomfortable about but have learnt to live with. Everyone probably has something that they were teased about as a child. However, in adulthood, we expect to be over the childhood banter. The average person has embraced their imperfections so pointing them out does not help anyone. It only magnifies the problem and increases the person’s discomfort. In fact, it could actually drive a wedge between you and that individual.

Imagine how many people miss out on a potentially good friendship because they choose to focus on and undermine someone about something beyond that person’s control.

So, next time you feel like pointing out something about someone, like the size of their feet, the freckles on their face, the thickness of their lenses, the texture of their hair, the pitch of their voice, their complexion, the shape of their head, the size of their hips or whatever else you find strange about the person, first ask yourself this: “Is it absolutely worth mentioning?” and: “Of what benefit is it to point it out?” If there is no real benefit in pointing out those traits to someone, then perhaps it’s best to just let it go. Focus on issues that matter and let go of what doesn’t. After all, you are not perfect either!

Of course it’s a different ballgame if the individual concerned points out that trait first and jokes about it. In that case, then the doors are open to teasing. However, my advice is simple, don’t be the first to tease the person about it. Let them give the license by raising it first.

  1. Don’t undervalue what’s important to others

We are all different and like to do different things. Some people like to exercise by walking, while others prefer the gym. Some people like to wear makeup while others prefer their natural look. Some people like to read for leisure while others would rather watch a movie. Some people like to be surrounded by a group of friends, while others enjoy solitude. The list is endless.

Sometime in the past, I was introduced people and we started getting to know each other. At some point, I asked to be excused as I had a commitment. On being asked further, I mentioned to the people I was with that I had to write something for my blog.

The immediate response was a dismissive: “That’s not important, let’s sit and talk.” Indeed, blogging was not important to them, but it is important to me and the subject they were discussing was of no interest to me. After a series of similar incidents, I had to extricate myself from that crowd. There is no way I could develop in my areas of interest when surrounded by people who did not value what’s important to me.  While it is possible to befriend people with different interests, this particular crowd was reluctant to accommodate anything outside their preferences.

My simple advice is, don’t impose your preferences on other people. Learn to respect what other people value, even if it is not your preference.

  1. Respect individuality

Finally and most importantly, I believe respecting people’s individuality is the starting point in any relationship whether it is at home, at school or in the workplace. Wherever we are, acknowledging that we are all individuals and were created differently will go a long way in helping us to relate with other people. Once we acknowledge and respect individuality, we enjoy our diversity. We learn to embrace our differences, appreciate other people’s positive qualities and accommodate their negative traits, particularly if they are harmless.

Respecting individuality helps us to live and let live.

Ultimately, it gives us an opportunity to benefit from the wealth of our diversity.

These three principles are not exhaustive, but at least contribute towards better relations. I hope you will find them beneficial as you navigate through the global village.

The Irrationality of Fear!

The most liberating acronym I’ve come across is the one that defines fear as:

F = false
E = evidence
A = appearing
R = real

Since I came across this acronym more than 15 years ago, I have learnt to face my fears and reduce them to mere figments of my imagination. The moment I sense the slightest hint of fear, I analyze its source and deal with it immediately. Consequently, there is very little that I’m afraid of. In fact, I would love to say that I am not afraid of anything, but that would be a big fat lie as there is just one thing that I have not yet learnt to dismiss with this acronym.
Snakes!

I am terrified of snakes. From the most innocuous to the very poisonous – as far as I am concerned, a snake is a snake. In my world, there is nothing like a harmless snake. As long as the creature slithers, it is harmful, poisonous and evil.

I am not ashamed to say I have ophidiophobia or ophiophobia.
Stories about this fear from childhood to the present abound. As a child right through to adolescence, my young brother’s rubber snake frightened me. Even if it was thrown at me 10 times and I knew it was made of rubber, it would still trigger a reaction. My mother had to make a specific rule that banned my siblings from involving me in any game to do with the rubber snake.

When I turned 10, my mother bought me a children’s encyclopedia for my birthday. I went through it with much zeal and enjoyed the learning experience until I got to the pages with snakes. Those pages gave me shivers and nightmares for weeks. They are the only part of the entire encyclopedia that went unread. I actually glued the pages together so I would never have to see the slithering creatures again.

Fast forward to adulthood and that fear has still not gone away.

Some years ago, we had a media training workshop at a lodge of the outskirts of Mutare in Zimbabwe. It was such a pleasant environment to be in and one of activities on offer was a nature walk. As my friend and I read through the information package in the room to find out more about what we were likely to see during the nature walk, we can across the dreaded word: “snakes!”

Apparently, we were likely to stumble upon pythons and some other rare snakes during the walk. Of course that was the end of our plan to take the nature walk. In fact, we were so miserable for the rest of our stay that we needed each other’s company to move around the premises. The thought of encountering slithering reptiles was enough to keep us indoors. Thankfully, it was cold and we spent most of our time by the fireplace, but fear was more compelling than warmth in keeping us indoors.

A few years ago, I met a really cute guy and it was not very long before we went on our first date. Unfortunately, as we drove home after that first date, a snake slithered across the road. It was a harmless snake probably seeking shelter from the rain, but for some strange reason, I figured it was a bad omen and that was the end of the potential relationship with the cute tall guy who all my friends were swooning over.

Looking back all these experiences seem so irrational, but then again, so is fear. There is absolutely no reason to be afraid of snakes, but I am. I don’t quite know what drives the fear. It could be a combination of the knowledge that they are poisonous and the cultural association of snakes with evil. Whatever the case is, I don’t know. What I know for sure is that I can rationalize my way out of every other fear, except that of snakes.

The topic for today in the 30 day #BloggingChallenge is “what are you afraid of,” so there you have it in one word. Snakes!

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